Friday, July 30, 2004

Time Out of it

Recently, Time Out-NY had a special that claimed to be everything you needed to know about the NY Music scene, and they listed bands that were on their way to being the next big thing or some shit. It was called All-Access or something pretentious like that, and the article tried to be everything to everybody, listing bands that probably play mostly at Kenny's or The Lions Den alongside those who frequently play Tonic. Let me go on record as saying that Time Out doesn't know a thing about the music scene. They proved that years ago when they said that the boring NYC band Versus was going to break out big, this after they'd already been around for years annoying the shit out of listeners. The only thing I learned from this article was the exact address of Tommy's Tavern (1041 Manhattan Ave. in Greenpoint)...

Well, Wednesday came and went, as did Thursday. The summer is flying by and no one with no money seems to be able to take a breather anymore/appreciate this short and sweet season. Vacation? what the f*ck does that mean? Yesterday, as I was riding my bike from a bogus Agency interview on the West Side around 23rd St., it occured to me to check out the water off the W'Side Hway, something I used to have time to do all the time in the summer. I rode over and fell asleep for like a half hour on a bench somehwere along the beautifully renovated Hudson river promenade. Damn, summer's almost gone and this was like the first time I wasn't so stressed that I had a moment to chill like that... Anyway, it felt profound, can't really explain it here...

So glad that Al Sharpton attacked GW Bush for trying to appeal directly to Black voters recently. How dare our President lie and talk down to African Americans and say that they'd have more political leverage with the GOP party. Who is he kidding? I actually think that Fat Al set the right tone for the last couple of days of the Dem convention, b/c Kerry had some fire in him. How cool is it that Kerry wrote his own speach? We MUST slaughter, I mean SLAUGHTER the republicans in November. They don't know what they have in store for them when they roll into town for their garden party in a month...

A couple of quick things, as I have to run:
the Blue Jays Carlos Delgado is the coolest MLB player. I'm sure you've heard how he refuses to stand and salute when they play "God Bless America" at games. he's acting on principal out of protest of the misguided Iraq war. More power to him. Hit 'em hard, hit 'em far man (just not against the Red Sox)...

I may have already said this, but as the GOP has reminded us again of Cheney telling a Dem official to f*ck himself ever since Kerry's wife said "shove it" to some right-wing reporter who'd be consistantly doggin' her, I was wondering whether y'all had seen in the Daily News a quote from Teddy Roosevelt that they printed recently. If not, please remember these words from our 26th president: "To announce that there must be no criticism of the President, or that we are to stand by the President, right or wrong, is not only unpatriotic and servile, but is morally treasonable to the American public"...

I'll try to write more original thoughts next time. Oh, you can check out some cd reviews I've written (as Alex Emanuel) at this website I'll be doing more for them... RM

Wednesday, July 28, 2004

"The party-unifying target is that Man in the White House and his coldblooded coterie of warmongering neocon homophobic tax cutters"-William Safire

I wish I came up with that line... Ahhhh, convention time. Fresh from hosting the greatest rivalry in Sports, with 3 high-scoring slugfests (and I mean slugfests) between the Bronx Bombers and the Red Sawx, b/w A is for Asshole Rod, Ruben Sier-ROID, Gary Shef- Boy-our-D(efense is Better than the Red Sox Defense) and co. vs. Jason Vari-TKO, Craig Let's Panic, No More? Garciapara and co., Boston rallied to take on those great white Elephant Republicans, with speachafying up the wazzoo. First, let me get the rest of my little Liver Sport thought out of the way. This Yankee Military-Might defeat by the hands of the Better Dead than Red Sox proved to be a series that not only saw 2 new spellings for Miller time (Millar Time and Mueller Time) for us dedicated Sox fans, but I think it also may have breathed a little fire into the Dem convention, which has helped make some of those wind bags soar. Not that they needed to see A-Rod get his face shoved in, but it may prove to be symbolic of hopefully flattening the GOP Fat Cats in November. Now, onto the major players at the Convention thus far: well, let's face it, Bill Clinton is just a damn good speaker. I, for one, remaina bit wary of Bill and Hill (Hill esp.), but Bill can still drill and thrill like no other. I missed poor Al gore's speach, but I'm happy the man has a platform to remind us fo some of those wrong doings 4 years back that have led to all those wrong doigns by the Bush Klan these past 4 years. I read that he asid something like "I, being the first person laid off by this administration..." or something like that. Brilliant. Tonight, I heard a few speaches: those by Dean, Gephardt, Ron Reagan and Teddy K, but the speach that delivered the most was the one by this Obama guy from IL. No wonder they say that he'll be the first black Prez (when he's not even a Senator yet). This skinny Jim has got it; the voice, the compassion, the charisma, the looks. Tim Russert's Tiger Woods analogy was a little too obvious, and didn't need to be said (becasue it's kind of demeaning-I mean, Golf isn't even a Sport), we were all thinking it. I missed Teresa Heinz Kerry's speach, so I don't know whether she told Dick Cheney to "Shove It" (by the way, that's waht A-Rod told Varitek-you see, Cheney doesn't realize that his verbal diarhea affects people. I used to think of A-Rod as a Tiger Woods type, but no more, as I said, A is for Asshole Rod), but I do know how pathetic it is to hear that Conservatives accross the country are now boycotting Heinz Ketchup. You'd think that they already would have been using only Hunt's Tomato Catsup, as H.L. Hunt was a notorious Right Winger...

Ok, sleep awaits-have to rise way too early for a shoot, and my thoughts are getting sloppy. I had more to spew, but will have to wait until Wed.

Saturday, July 24, 2004

Rollo plays tonight at humongous Bushwick Brooklyn Loft/Roof Party @ 10pm w/ DJ's and sh*t

The Preemptive Bash: a party to celebrate the defeat of George W. Bush July 24th, starts at 8pm 1089 Willoughby Ave., #304 (b/w Wilson & Central Aves) in Bushwick. 3 in 1
festivities: dancefloor w/ djs Rhizone, Sean Smith and others, a "chillout" zone, food, drink and cool rock bands like us... Hope to see you there. call me if you need directions 646-325-8719. It's not my party, but I can tell you how to get there baby.

"Too bad that all the people who know how to run this country are busy driving taxis and cutting hair" -George Burns

Oh God, hot damn. A couple of quick thoughts:

There's a new reality show called "Amish in the City". My first instinct was to second the reviewer who's review I read said that this was totally unacceptable and repugnant TV programming (as if previous reality shows haven't been). I do think we're treading into some pretty dangerous territory here when we exploit those whose beliefs are "old fashioned" or not consistent with the media, but the review failed to mention that taking some Amish kids to LA and introducing them to vices and other temptations that run against their cultural ways of thinking is in keeping with the common practice of the Amish of sending their teens away for a year to f*ck around int he city so that they know what the outside world has to offer. I forget the name of this ritual, but I believe there was a story not so long ago where an Amish teen got busted for dealing coke while he was on one of these excursions to manhood. Exploiting this rite of passage in a TV show though still smacks to me of some form of slave trade or something though...

Governor Arnold "Kindergarden Cop" Schwarzenegger called some Democratic legislators "girlie men". Campaign advisor for the CA Dem party said in reply "I've always considered him a jerk, and this just reinforced that". It also won't be the last mistep by the barbarian I'm sure, and it's just a matter of time before he starts showing his Nazi ways. Terminate his governorship, asap.

Hey guys, no more tucking, according to the fashion police, shirt tails are a flyin'. Damn, so I've been at the forefront of future fashion forever and I didn't even know it...

Liver Sports report: The Yankees are 10 games ahead of the Red Sox in first place with the best record in Baseball and they've reahced a "crisi point" in their starting rotation, so much so they they are most likely going to persuade the Diamondbacks to give them Randy Johnson, on eof the best pitchers of all-time, for most likely Miguel Cairo or something. When is enough enough? In getting rid of George W. Bush, I think we should also consider sacking George Steinbrenner, as he may in fact be ruining baseball like Dubya's been ruining the country.

So, NY Post Master Murdoch is bankrolling Ralph Nader's book to get the Nader word out there, like he really cares about what's written. This news comes to us just as we hear that republicans accross the country are helping Nader get on the Prez ballots by signing them like theres no tomorrow, to insure that Nader voters are not "disenfranchised". F*cking lying, self serving hypocritical bastards. Let's take the advice of Devo and Holocaust survivor Michel Thomas, who really experienced the collapse of a Democracy. Listen to this man when he reminds us that "Hitler did not come to power by force, but by the rules of Democratic law... it was the uneducated people who brought Hitler to power". Sound familiar? Look, I voted for Nader once already, but now's not the time, dig? Don't be stupid.

911 Panel says: we are not safe, 90210 panel says: duh, Devo says: are we not men?

It's been a long time since I blogged my soul. I'll try my best to recap (no, not decap-been there, done that (see blogs of yor). When last you saw Rollo Manhattan in Manhattan, he was fessing up to a blog blunder. That particular entry got more feedback than most on here in fact. Here's one anon response: "I read today's blog and I thought it was really great. I don't know whose feelings you hurt in your blog but if I were the particular friend, I would forgive you. In fact, I give you permission to slam me hard in your blog
sometime. Friendships are complex truces between two naturally egotistical egos and venting is natural & healthy... I also liked your analysis of Randy Johnson & Pedro Martinez & Curt Schilling (?) (I can't remember the third pitcher exactly) and how you
called them "offensive" pitchers who provoke batters. Terrific. Did you come up with that analysis yourself?". Yup, all by my lonesome...

Anyway, now on to new things. It's not easy to recap, as I find that when I try to do that I tend to scatter ideas all over the place-which isn't bad if ideas are like basehits, and you're a pitcher who scatters them throughout a game and the opposing team just never seems to get them in a clutter (and thus score runs), but it's bad if you're that tough luck team, and I generally liken these types of entries to being like one of those teams. I'll do my best though, whether my best is good enough or not... here goes: I don't think I mentioned in my last blog about the Siren Fest in Coney Island, which I managed to attend for the duration of 3 bands only (as I didn't show up until 330pm and I had work at 6pm). In short, I saw sections of 3 band sets; those of The Constantines, TV on The Radio and The Fever. Of course I wanted to see Mission of Burma and Death Cab, but couldn't, and I've seen Blonde Redhead many times (I know Simone) and they most likey would've been fantastic as usual, and ATWKUBT Trail of Dead I've seen too, and I'm sure they would have thrown down as they're more than able. Here are my thoughts on those acts that I did catch: The Constantines were consistantly a yawner, The Fever had absolutely no fever pitch to speak of-a big disapointment live, as their cd sounds pretty good, but TV on the Radio? Hell, they exceeded my expectations by far, and have that special something which will def. make them go far, even if they're tabbed the Living Colour of Indie Rock or something stupid like that...

I don't need to comment on my 911 panel header as that whole fiasco speaks for itself. I will say though that I saw Devo last night with Stellastar* and The Yeah Yeah Yeahs, and they were absolutely f*cking phenomenal. Even with the downer downpour all day up to the show and the rain-on-cue as soon as they finished their final encore, Devo delivered-o. I for one never thought I'd see these guys live, and here they were, these fat 50 year old guys w/ receding hairlines decked out in torn and frayed yellow jumpsuits whipping it into shape and the crowd into a frenzy. They rocked, harder than most bands I've seen in ages. People forget that, unlike Kraftwerk, Devo was a guitar band first and foremost. It was unreal seeing their cross generational fans too with flower pot hats chanting along, and a surreal scene afterwards to be sure as we all moved in a cluster f*ck all happy and content under umbellas singing Devo tunes as the sky opened up something fierce on us. All these fake looking yuppysiders stared in awe at the spectacle of the throngs of Devotees making their collective way to the subway. It could have been like the Who concert circa '78 if we weren't all so damn satisfied after seeing Devo sing that they can't get no satisfaction. There was only one unfortunate part of the concert (only because it made those who saw it laugh at the band, as opposed to laugh along with it), that was when one of Devo-after they'd stripped into their black shorts, high sox and knee pad soccer player ensemble-started bopping up and down to the degree that his shlong and ball package fell out of his shorts and flapped along like a wet sock in the wind. It was funny b/c Sara (my friend with whom I attended the concert) had just said to me "his shorts are way too short". They were, in relation to those worn by the other bandmembers, but just as I was about to take umbridge with her comment and say that those Umbro-style short shorts were all the rage back when, out popped this Devo dong and donut duo... and then again... and then again. Anyway, enough of that. Devo rocked man, shwance appearance or no shwance appearance, as did Karen O and co. before them (we didn't get there in time wo see Stellastar*, but I'd seen them a couple months back at Irving and they blew me away). We went to the Devo afterparty afterwards and I managed to give a Rollo cd to a beaming Karen O, who told me she'd listen to it pront-o. I kissed her on the cheek and told her I was in love with her (not really, I mean I did kiss her, and I do love her, but i didn't tell her). I also gave a cd to the Cure-esque guitarist of Stellastar*, who laughed as he read the blurb "Holy f*ckin' sheep shit, contains 2 extra tracks!!!" that I'd affixed to our 3 song cds... Anyway, very cool evening...

I'm going to end this entry here and start another, as I'm afraid I'm about to lose all I've written to the self-refresh that seems to happen to my shit computer after I write for long periods of time like this. Talk soon-RM

Monday, July 19, 2004

Defense Offensive: cutting up, spending time on and taking one's own initiative

Imagine if we could increase spending on time itself, as that is where our spending goes the most. Would cutting spending on time make us cut to the chase more often though, or would it just cut the time we have even more? Hmmmm... well, I'm not here to speak about spending actually, but to spend a slice of my time in defense of cutting-up, taking one's own (key word: own) initiative and speaking freely (as our constitution allows), even when that which is being spoke may come off as offensive at times. Confused? Well so am I, so I'm going to try to straighten things out here. I'm penning these words b/c I accidentally offended someone whom I love deeply in these pages recently, even though I thought I had taken pains not to do so. After this was brought to my attention, I went back and realized that, yeah, I didn't quite say what I had meant to say, I got carried away, and was unintentionally offensive. I can be a loose cannon sometimes, that I know, but I would never mean to offend someone who did not deserve a good bit o' venting. This blog is my free-for-all, bare in mind, and anyone reading it should remain aware of that, or not read it at all. I do make mistakes on it, and this was a mistake for which I am definitely accountable. This is a personal public journal, one which I've chosen to share with you, and while you will not hear me say everything that's on my mind (as that would be just plain stupid), I will not refrain from speaking my mind. Sometimes my words are meant to provoke, but sometimes, as was the case here, I just string them together badly. I'm not being paid for this, and am normally accountable to no one, no proof reader, editor, authority figure, no one, so I'll skewer whomever I want, but this wasn't a case where I meant to skewer. This does not excuse the facts, but let me just say that, more often than not, I just simply say things the wrong way rather than say the wrong things (I hope). What I said here was not meant AT ALL as an indictment of choices made, but merely a statement saying where I stand on these things. I can be opinionated, have weird ideas perhaps and screwy principals, and as this is my blog, they will come out from time to time. I'm also a cut-up, and some things I say, I say merely to play Devil's Advocate, not because I'm necessesarily trying to provoke. I do find it kind of funny that I am not taken seriously often when I should be, but then something I say off the cuff is taken seriously... but that's neither here nor there. I totally apologize, and I didn't mean what I said to be taken any other way than how I meant it, which was just a momentary thought, not so well thought out, that I needed to express. Keep in mind that I write songs, and they are meant to raise eyebrows, always. As I stated in my blog header, this is like an extended song of mine, and I say let people get what they want out of this. If lyrics I write mean one thing to one person and a completely different thing to someone else, that's cool. I also tend to take chances. Hell, my whole frickin' professional life thus far has been a chance taken, and sometimes, well, yeah, I get taken too. What I don't want to do, however, is chance hurting those I love in any way. If you know me, you know that. Sometimes I question whether some people who purport to know me really do (but that's a subject for another entry). Now, I can go back and delete blog history here if I want, but as I can't do that in real life, I won't invoke the Blog Stalin. I sincerely hope that my word/repentance will suffice, and things aren't taken personally that should not be (and, well, ok, I'll do a little bit of editing too). I posess a super-conscience you see, as well as a rather perfectionist/artist mentality that takes me over sometimes, and as that was a pretty offensive piece of writing by me in many ways, it deserves a little nip and tuck... Now I'd like to get back to my musings on defense and offense. These are 2 words that are most often taken to mean the exact opposite of one another, right? The act of defending, or to defend means to protect, whilst to offend means to excite anger, affront and annoy. Naturally, the word defense was a more popular choice to label the U.S. military, when in fact, our country has rarely had to defend, and have really used our spending to promote an unequaled super power offense. This makes sense when you think of sports, where the glamour players are those with great offense, not those wimpy defenders (whom we all know are of equal importance). We forget though that the word offense also conjurs up images of mean-spirited aggressive behavior, resentment and bad attitude. Pitchers Roger Clemens, Pedro Martinez and Randy Johnson are really examples of offensive pitchers, b/c they provoke batters. Those pitchers may be going the way of the batter who incites (notice how you don't see too many Ty Cobb-type hitters come to the plate anymore), but i dunno. The military could actually capitalize on the misconception that the word receives from Sports-why call our military might our Defense, when really, we're out there offending the shit out of people all over the world. They could just call it what it is; our Offense. Or, maybe they should call it our Deforce, which more adequately describes our knack of witholding stuff by force from less-strong countrys who may be the rightful owners... Anyway, I had more to say on other fun subjects, but my lack of clarity is becoming quite clear to me as I grow more and more weary at this late hour... One final note: Rollo is playing a special early show this Wednesday night, July 21st at Sin-e, located at 150 Attorney Street b/w Stanton and Houston. We're on at 8pm sharp-hope to see you there.

Friday, July 16, 2004

Britney litany: "I'm Britney Spears, & I'm NOT an alcoholic... but I do support Bush. Still, I'm just an employee in this maximum war they've waged"

I'll give her that (that's she's no drunk), and that she does, or did (support Bush). Hey, before I mention that I finally saw Farhenheit 911 last night and that it was all that and more (read: genius, scathing, beautiful, disturbing, amazing, unbelievable), apparently I wasn't the only one who noticed the NY Post's latest front page gaffe yesterday. They splashed a picture of Britney obviously drinking one of those little deli ginsing bottles w/ the headline "Britney Hits the Bottle". I was like, "are you kidding me!?", as I read on about the "boozing bottle blonde" caught in these "shocking" photos "swilling what appears to be a mini-bottle" of alcohol in broad daylight. Who runs that paper and gives the go ahead on it's stories? Anybody with a pea-sized brain would recognize that she was not drinking booze yo-was actually happy to read today that she's filing a lawsuit. There's no way she'll get a retraction from the right wing media monsters who run that rag, as Republican's don't admit to making mistakes you know. Damn, this is gonna be an easy payday for Britney. Maybe she can then buy a legit pair of shorts, b/c those cut-off short-shorts she's usually seen wearing cannot possibly be giving her bush much support anymore... Ok, that was bad, so sue me. I just can't get over the Post sometimes. How does toilet paper like that get away with calling itself a newspaper, and not merely the tabloid it is? They consistantly get stuff wrong and can be in-your-face with outrageously biased/politicized reporting. Sometimes I laugh, but during this important election year, my integrity level has been going bonkers when I've opened up this paper. I'm not sure whether I can read it again (a statement I'm sure which means very little to absolutly no one). Reading it for me has become like using a product for a sponser/company that I know is wrong. We all boycot Coors, but that at least can refresh. The republicans talk about values but then they willing compromise the intelligence of their constituency/readers. Not that I'm going to immediately dump Citibank and Time Warner because of their apparent shady dealings-something I was made aware of in Michael Moore's brilliant flick-but they're just corrupt companies providing me with necessary services. Besides, I never chose Citibank anyway, they bought EAB, not me. As to Time Warner, well I don't have a home phone, so I've no choice if I want to continue computing from my crib... Anyway, gotta run, but let me join the chorus singing praise of Fahrenheit 911 with the mantra SEE IT NOW! SEE IT NOW! I will not be happy until the Bush gestapo has been trounced in the elections, yes, trounced. After then, let the independent council hearings begin and try those bastards on war crimes, crimes against America and humanity, high treason and contempt of everything under the sun...

I was gonna add some Liver Sport stuff to todays' blog, but I'll just drop one on you as sports seem kind of trivial to talk about now. There's really no connection b/w the following quote and what I was just talking about (and if there can be, I don't care to elaborate on it), I just thought it was a great quote. It appeared on the Boston Red Sox website today, and it's by the honorable Pedro Martinez. I don't necessarily agree with what he says, but I dig the way he says it. After he was not tabbed to start the first game of the 2nd half of the season for the team, he told reporters "I wasn't chosen to pitch the first game. Whoever was chosen to pitch the first game is going to. (The Manager) chose me to pitch the second game, I'm going to pitch in the second game. If he throws me out for the first one, I'll pitch in the first one. I'm only an employee here."

I was also going to comment on the report that Governor Pataki pays his interns $13 p/hr while refusing to up the minimum wage from a paltry $5.15 p/hr, but this gross injustice speaks for itself. I remember seeing a TV news story over 10 years ago on a proposed minimum wage increase, in which a reporter asked some inner city teenagers their oppinion on the matter. This one kid chimes in "they what? Damn, you need at least $10 an hour just to survive man!". As I said, that was over 10 years ago.

In conclusion, make no attempt to really tie together these very disparate entries today. Whether Britney or her Bush are drinking or not, I don't know. I, however, do know that I had quite a few last night, and it has made writing a bit tough today.

Thursday, July 15, 2004

P Diddy dumb did he do? Perhaps, but while there’s no love for Courtney anymore, Slim is fast to Whoopi daisy Cutter over Pussy Prez “hatefest” remar

I got some good feedback on my succinct Celebrity reviews of a couple days back, and I got some good feedback from my guitar at le Rollo rehersal tonight as well. I’m not here to speak Rollo right now though-will just say that we rock and Rollo'd, and fought of course-but we're not going the way of Metallica yet (in regards to therapy), as we hashed it all out on a street corner after slugging only beers at Bar 119. I do think it's ironic though that I'd written here a few times about bad band shit before I saw that article in Sunday's Times; “The Shrinking of the American Band”. Am I spot-on or am I spot- on this thing yo? Here's a quote from the article: "bands' dynamics are similar to those of marriages (in that they relay on long term consensual bonds) and sibling relationships (in that they frequently involve rivalries" nuff said…
So, I'm gonna add more to the short list of celebs I've encountered and the impression (or lack thereof) that they left on me. This may be yet another ongoing feature here, and def. a reason for the one reader of “snot” (beiside myself) to keep tuned in. First I want to say a couple things about 2 "musicians" turned "actors", P Diddy and Courtney Love, and make light, not Whoopi, of the recent Goldberg flap. As to P Diddy (otherwise known as Puff Daddy, Snuff Druggy and Poof He Deady), well, let me just say that I was prepared to dis gladly his performing on the great white way (do they still call it that?) in “Raisin in the Sun”, esp. as I read that he said that not until "the 100th show" was he able to take risks onstage. Then, however, I read how he gave major props to the craft of stage acting/actors in general, saying that they are "underpaid and overworked, and it needs to get better. For 4 hours you turn your life inside out to do this. Nobody -nobody- works harder than actors". Right on P. I love this guy now. I'd give him another 100 runs to get it right if he needed it, just drop Ashton Kutcher as your wheel boy, ok?.... Courtney Love? Well, she falls on the opposite side of the spectrum for me, as she's had more than enough time to prove that she's worth the surgically enhanced slab of flesh that she thrusts in our faces. I don't even pity the fool. Good riddance I say, and thank Godsmack her daughter apparently has someone else to see to her well being these days, instead of being stuck with that freak, who just aint well. Let me just say this: when I recorded with Steve Albini last year, I just had to ask him about certain individuals he'd worked with in the past, one being Ms. Love. Well, he paused for a second, and then said, and I paraphrase: "I've met many, many people over the years doing this, but I have to say that she is by far the worst human being that I have ever met"... Finally, I just wanted to say how sad it is that Whoopi Goldberg (who, along with Hillary Clinton is a woman who’s not speaking primetime at the Dem convention) gets fired by Corporate America for expletives said about Bush (comparing him to a twat, or couter or pussy or something), but Dick Cheney, Mr, Corporate America, can swear at whomever he likes and hold his job (until he figures out a way to remove himself or grow hair to strengthen the GOP ticket). President Pussy missed an opportunity there. Kerry spokeswoman Stephanie Cutter was right to say that “Bush should get his head out of the clouds and address the real need of the American people”, like fixing Cheney and the economy. On that note, I give you some more succinct reviews of celebrities I've come into contact with:

Vincent D'Onofrio- about as cool as they come
Jack Nicholson- cooler
Jon Stewart- somewhere in between the previous 2 on the cool scale
Matt Dillon- bigger head than any big head previously mentioned
Sarah Jessica Parker- looks like a malnourished colt
Juliette Lewis- butt ugly
Governor Pataki- left no impression whatsoever
Steve Buscemi- reminded me of a Steve Buscemi character
Aaron Eckhart- way smaller than you'd think
Joaquin Phoenix- blocky, hair lippy
Robert Redford- a very tan, wrinkled dwarf
Iggy Pop-very cool, wrinkled dwarf
Adam Goldberg- cannot for the life of me understand how this guy keeps booking acting jobs
Ethan Hawke- poseur (I know, I’ve already said that)
Renee Zelwigger- looks even more like a red pucker-faced chipmunk in real life
Bette Middler- an annoying nag
Cindi Lauper- an annoying voice emanates from this woman
Woody Allen- would he be full of himself? Hmmmm…
Conan O'Brien- a veritable giant, with a homohabelius sized noggen ala Jaws in Moonraker
Michael J. Fox- short and shaky (sorry Michael)
Harvey Keitel- profoundly ugly in a striking way
Tommy Lee Jones- see above description of Harvey Keitel
Elle McPherson- I shared a bathroom with her and waited to hear her pee before I went-a testament to her profound beauty
Monica Lewinsky- rotund
Lili Taylor- eats with her hands
Gavin Rosdale- gay

I gotta go to bed now

Wednesday, July 14, 2004

The Economists just don't get it...

Well, that's not news, but then again, that's not what I mean when I say "get it". The NY Times reported the other day in their Ideas & Trends section that "increasing the frequency of sexual intercourse from once a month to at least once a week provided as much happiness as putting $50,000 in the bank". I don't know about you, but I could sure use 50 G's right now. Yeah, getting laid rocks, but shooting a load and the orgasm euphoria that follows is way more fleeting than getting a butt load of dough. True, $50 grand doesn't buy that much considering, but the happiness it would give some folks as they get out of debt (that would clear mine), buy a car, take a vacation (where you could get laid in the sun sipping a frothy tropical cocktail) beats soiling the sheets hands down, and I'm 100% certain that 99% of the copulation population would agree. "Fitty"-thousand duckets also has got to beat beating the meat-which I'm sure many of those economists who aren't doing the wild thing must be doing on a regular scrotation. Of course "the more sex, the happier the person" holds true, but it's also a no-brainer that w/ more money cums more opportunity to have sex, and I don't think anybody would argue with me about that, whether you're talking about paying for "it" or not. the bottom line is that this was/is a complete waste of research time and money, and it's just another example of people who have money taking it for granted. I really think that those powers that be are trying to convince us poor proles to stay that way, accumulating all the wealth while insisting that the old proverb "money can't buy happiness" is true-you know that's part of the Republican "dumb, fat, barefoot and pregnant" strategy. These Economists are either trying to further condition us to these shit conditions, or they just plain have no idea. I wonder who funded this study? Probably the Religious Right, right? You know, those high arch bishop priest types w/ their sleazy Cheney grins who preach celibacy and family values and then commune with little boys in the confessional booths, those guys who think prostitution is morally wrong but degradation isn't. Sorry, guys but money buys more sex, and I'll prove it to you if you give me some (money).

Tuesday, July 13, 2004

Dude, I wanna win somebody a car...

Middle of the night-enjoying the sound of the fan, feel of the rain in the air, and the overall calm of a city sleeping. Def. not a time for ranting about ranting. I will, however, post, as I'm obligated to do so, perhaps even by some higher calling... or at least by someone high who was just calling. Diehard baseball fan that I am, I would be remiss not to do a little Liver Sport spot and say something about the game at the All-Star break, though Kruk, Reynolds (who really does sound like Chris Rock, but look like Lyman Bostock) and co. have said it all. The All-Star festivities have somehow become a veritable All-Star week-probably one reason Commish Bud has called this era in time the new Golden Era of baseball (or perhaps that refers to the golden shower of urine testing that the government may sieze in its attempt to crack down on roid round trippers). Whatever the case, I just wanted to mention, as a Red Sox fan, that I'm genuinely psyched to see our own Paul Bunyunesque David Ortiz represent and enjoy himself so. Here's the rare unselfish ballplayer who gives the game a good name. This guy garners respect when he speaks up, and he carries a loud bat. No one hits better in the clutch and rallys for boosts and inspires his teammates like him, and, he manages to raise money for relief efforts in his homeland Dominican in his spare time. He also smiles from ear to ear and manages to appear both intense and happy go lucky at the same time. I love this guy, Steinbrenner's gotta be kicking himself for not seeing the potential Ortiz had. Hell, I'm not sure th Sox brass knew, as they mostly signed him as a favor to Pedro Martinez. Since then though, he's been MVP caliber, and like everything you'd hoped for from the Boomers, Sam Horns and Mos but were afraid to ask. It's amazing the Sox got him for peanuts (baseball peanuts that is; not to be confused with the kind you eat, but the kind that most people have to work two to three lifetimes to earn). Below are a few things King David the Jolly Green Monster Goliath Ortiz said today at the All-Star games home run derby. Perhaps he's kind of a Berra for the modern era...? Whatever the case, we dig David Ortiz here in Rollo Manhattan:

On the plethara of 500 homer hitters present:
"A guy walked through, I'm saying `I can't believe he hit 560 (home runs). I can't believe he hit 6-something. I can't believe he hit 7-something.' Dude, you know how hard it is to hit a home run? I had guys walking by me, all of them hit 500 homers. I was like, I'm going to try to win, but I already got what I wanted, to see those guys even once in my life. I had a lot of fun, dude. You know, from now on I'm going to [do well] in the first half, because I want to be in every All-Star Game."

Enthusiastically replaying the recent birth of his son:
"Saturday, July 10, 3:30 in the afternoon, right before BP," Ortiz said. "Seven pounds, two ounces. A big old boy." Does he look like a ballplayer? Another belly laugh. "He looks pretty much right now like a cartoon, believe me."

On his wearing a 3 piece suit (while other players were dressed casual) b/c his luggage didn't show up:
"My boys have been giving me such a hard time, but it's better to wear some clothes than to be naked. My suitcase with all my regular clothes, they're still in Boston. The look I was supposed to have tonight, I wore during the day, so I don't know, I might have to hide in my room tonight."

On whether there was any National League pitcher he was looking forward to facing:
"Randy Johnson. I'm just kidding, dude".

On Houston's Lance Berkman, who was 1st runner up in the dinger derby:
"How about Berkman, dude. He was awesome. I was expecting him to go lefty, and he was ... 'I'm going to put on a show here.' He put so much into it that one round that he got a little tired. The home run derby, dude, you get tired."

On teammate Manny Ramirez, who did his best to urge Ortiz on to victory, even walking to home plate during the middle of his round and rubbing his neck:
"He was trying to program me."

Saturday, July 10, 2004

Lies, and the lying, sad mofos who spew that crap...

Ok, so you think I'm angry...? Well, I am. Not at Al Franken, whom I adore (whatever happened to Tom Davis though?) or at GW Dubyah, whom I haven't got time for this morning, but at an ex-band of mine (who will remain nameless b/c I don't want to give them any more undeserved publicity then they already have, not that anyone's reading this blog...yet), and specifically, at their vindictive little weisel guitarist. I was surfing through some indie rock e-zine review sites, doing some research for my glorious band Rollo (, as we're at that press point, when I stumbled upon two, not one, but 2 erroneous reviews of my ex-band that stroked me for my singing and bass playing, but did not credit me. I was the lead singer/co-songwriter and Bassist in this band for 2 years, and we recorded an ep with Steve Albini (the disc that garnered the 2 reviews in question) at his studio, Electrical, in Chicago. The band parted ways last September b/c of artistic differences (and the fact that the other 2 guys were in love with each other and the googly eyes being made were getting in the way). One of these 2 reviews I ran into this morning totally digs my voice/lyrix, but credits my singing in a "unique, raspy snarl" that "perfectly fits the mood" as I moan "about perversion and breakdowns" to another guy in the band, and my bass playing throughout the cd, including the bassline on the song that "carries the melody" to their chick bassist who wasn't even in the band at the time. The other review raves about a certain lyric of mine "maybe I just got the runs", saying "if that's the correct lyric, well, excellent—it means ________ isn't going to bother with ostentatious rock lyric posturing, and actually say what they mean. And more power to them". This review then states that "Lead singer ________ (not me, BUT ME) even goes a little Tom Verlaine-esque on the vocals at times." Cool, but come on, give credit where credit is due yo! I didn't toil and sweat blood chunks over a blank white page for nothin' spewin'out that stuff, or reherse up the ass for all that time just so my hard work could be attributed to some other schmuck. This review goes on to heap praise on an instrumental tune that I penned with the group, noting the stellar bass groove, but saying it was this chick, who wasn't even a glint in my other ex-band member's eyes at the time, who layed it down... Look, I love my new band, it's the best one I've been in, and folks who've caught us these past 2 months have said so, but reading this shit burns me man. I'm not crying over spilt beer, but I don't deserve this. Now, I don't blame the e-zines, for how would they know? But I do hold my ex-band accountable for knowingly misleading the reviewers. It's really unfortunate that this band, esp. the guy who they credit as lead singer (and I'll tell you about him and why in a minute), perhaps out of spite, have decided to dupe listeners, reviewers and readers by rewriting the bands past. Hell, I don't give a load how they splice n' dice the reviews on their website to not-include me, but don't lie to e-zines about who did what, how, when and where, that's bad karma man. When I left the group, I immediately began putting my own band Rollo together. However, while that was taking the time it needed to gel (as forming a band takes time), I played bass with this band The Swedes. We played a few gigs (most likely before my ex-band regrouped), and I sent out emails to many friends and contacts, some who I met when I was w/ said ex-band. Well, long story short, this one particular ex-bandmate went psycho on me, spraying my new band with profanity-laden emails, and leaving a message on my phone screaming expletives and telling me to "keep a look over my f_ckin' shoulder from now on" b/c I'm "f_cked", calling me a "vulnerable little prick" an' shit. Then (now listen to this) he went so far as to delete The Swedes email account I'd created. I found out it could only have been this guy from Yahoo, and by friends who started getting emails again from my ex-band out of the blue months after I split from them... Now, first of all, I'm not a little guy, I'm bigger then this guy in fact, and a biger man then he is apparently accross the board. What he's done is dispicable, perhaps not unfathomable, but downright sad and petty. If you want, you can hear some of the words I sung in that old band in new songs on Rollo's website. Both of the lines refered to above I resurrected in fact in the song "Live Wired", which you can hear for yourself. If you write, then I'm sure you understand and sympathize with me about this, because the pain that goes into penning each word and phrase in a piece, as well as creating a viable arc, something that is often elusive, is real, and, like I said before, credit should really be given where credit is due, don't you think? I can't really do anything about what's happened other than explain it to you here. As anyone who's ever been in a band knows, it's like being in a relationship, and when shit goes wrong, it goes wrong. I've had a few bad band experineces, mostly b/c of misdoings by megalomaniacal childish control freak frontmen and women (something that this guy was, though he wasn't the frontman), but what's happened here takes the cake, hand's down. Restraining orders against past bandmates though? Well,I'm not really interested in going that route right now, as it's really a waste of my valuable, limitted time. Of course, if you find me face first in a ditch, or hear that I've been whacked, just remember this name: Joe Penna, teller of lies.

Friday, July 09, 2004

Breaking News 7/9/04: "U.S. Intelligence Exaggerated Iraqi Weapons Reports, THE Donald is NOT happy"

Naw, you don't say? You mean they... they lied to us? Get out! Well I'll be the monkey man's uncle... It's amazing how we're all still worried (like there's no tomorrow) that Bush is gonna win the upcoming election (hell, I am), when it should really be a landslide in Kerry's favor. If there was an incumbant in any other election who was fucking off like Bush has, we'd be writing his obit already, but this is the election after THE election. I think it very well may be a landslide, but no one is taking anything for granted this year. Mistrust of the system is rampant. The results of the fiasco of 2000, and the last four years of the (hands down)worst presidential term by far ever, have made us collectively wary as hell. That, and a renewed sense of activism, because we, the people, have been cheated, are perhaps the only good things that one can say have resulted from the Bush coup of 4 years ago and his misteps since. These 2 results though, however fleeting, are pretty major, maybe even more so than any symbolic, temporary legislative triumphs that a regime may have. Should Bush and his new running mate -b/c you know he'll get a new running mate, even though Cheney will still be in charge (pulling the strings from his underground bunker where he undoubtedly has naked manservents on leashes)-win, heads'll roll, mark my words. Some naysayers say we might be better off if that happens, as revolution will be that much closer. Perhaps, but I do think we'll all be too beaten down to revolt the way a society ought to revolt by then, as we'll be living under the gun even more so than we are today. It won't get to that point though, b/c Bush family presidencies are historically one-term too-long presidencies anyway, and it is important to heed the lessons from history...

One more thing, Donald Trump, yes, THE Republican Donald has called the Iraq war "a mess". "What's the purpose of the whole thing?" he asked as he flipped his 4 foot comb-over. He went on to say "how is it possible that we can't find a guy who's 6-foot-6 and supposedly needs a dialysis machine? Can you explain that one to me? We have all our energies focused on one place-where they shouldn't be focused." He refused to comment on whether or not he would fire Bush, nor did he shed any light on his unusual do. Apparently, he wasn't speaking of Osama Bin Laden either when he talked about the 6'6" guy, but about the Knicks getting guard Jamal Crawford. He believes they are going in
the wrong direction with their possible pursuit of Kobe Byant and/or Shaq. When told that Crawford is actually only 6'5", not on dialysis, and a marginal talent who might not be the best investment for a team trying to make the playoffs next year, he... oh what's the use.

"KERRY'S CHOICE: Dem picks Gephardt as VP candidate" -NY Post's Bush Birthday "EXCLUSIVE" 7/6/04

...Yeah, the Post had to live up to there mantle of sheer stupidity. Actually, the way they dealt with it, by not dealing with it (not taking the papers off the stands) was pure Republican pig-headed strategic denial at its best; "What? What are you lookin' at? What the f_ck are you tawking about? We didn't do nothin' wrong, never happened, It's Kerry's fault, he DID pick Gephardt, then he waffled, just like usual". I hate that rag. What do they have to offer us newspaper-wise except for being the conservative tabloid around town; devil's advocate if you will to the Daily News, a rag itself to be sure, but with "the best sports in town" and liberal leanings that at least make it readable. My beautiful and talented sister Anna-Jane Grossman works for the Post, so I wont say anything more. They at least had the brain "sell" to snatch her from the NY Observer and pay her what she's worth. And, as to their Veep blunder, thanks to their "exclusive" report I got a glimpse of Gephardt's hot daughter Chrissie for the first time (snapshot on pg.4, right over the quintessential tabloid title "President pedels clear of peeping press")...

Anyway, been a few days since I blogged. As is the case when that happens, the shit I've wanted to write about has gotten as backed up as a can full o' Bounty. The 5th-8th saw, among other things, another Rollo gig, this time at LIT, on the 7th. We took no prisoners as usual (or at least that has started to become the case as we're hitting our stride). I gotta say, LIT is a great place to play. The sound, for such a tiny tavernous venue, is remarkably clear. As to the clientelle? Well, the eye-popping female contingent there may be insurmountable. Rollo's next gig isn't until 7/21 at Sin-e. We've been going full-steam ahead gig-wise for 2 months now, and the couple of off weeks'll be nice-get to pen a new tune or 2. I'll also get a chance to hone in on some of these acting projects I have coming up (one being a Washington Politico who's part radio announcer/part Joker from Batman-fun role indeed)...

I still haven't seen "Fahrenheit 9/11" (not "Fahrenheit 90210" as I heard someone call it-though that's funny as hell). I did have the chance to go see a flick recently-first time in ages, and I went with this annoying chick to see "Spider-Man 2". Why, you ask? Good question, because except for the fight sequences involving Alfred Molina (interesting face, good actor) as Doc Ock, the film was a complete bust. Ok, I know that it's supposed to be a comic book-hell, I collected Spider-Man comix (and still have 'em)-but did they have to dumb the thing down SO much? Tobey McGuire is always appealing in his stoned smiley way, but besides him and Molina, the rest of the cast was horrible. Esp. Kristin Dunst. I really think that they picked the wrong chick from The Vigin Suicides to hype, and her breasts have fallen quite a bit since that rainy scene in Spidey one. From the horrible opening title drawings (couldn't Marvel have gotten an artist with talent to do them?) to the Chinese street musician plunking the Spider-man theme song on her violin, to that bizarre Alfie-esque montage with a reformed Peter Parker stumbling around to Burt Bachrach, and throughout the horrendous wooden dialogue, this film had no Spidey senses. You'd think a film about a smart teen would be smart...

I gotta start doing some cd reviews, as that's what so many of these rock-kid blogs do. Actually, I've done a few, but now's not the time for one in-depth, so I'm going to rattle off a few quick ones of new rock band discs:

Cold Fuss... The Killers/"Hot Fuss" - what's all the fuss about? Ok, they're probably hot live-missed 'em that night they opened for Stellastarr* at irving, but the cd is way too 80's derivative, and only gets "original" when the singer sings like Morrisey ("Some smile like you mean it", "Change your mind"). The rest of the disc sounds like a poor man's Stellastarr*, w/ uninteresting guitar/vox.

Squeak... Modest Mouse/"Good News for People who Love Bad news" - shrill as usual. I dug them back in '97 ("The Lonesome Quiet West"), but now? These guys are lucky. An overly whiny Built to Spill w/out songs. Pretentious album title.

Hopelessly Devo-ted?... The Fever/"Red Bedroom" - even if they are Defevo Revo, mevo lovedo Devo. I enjoyed this disc at first listen, made me want to check 'em out live. I think they're playin' at the Siren Fest.

High School Male Model Confidential... Ambulance/(a burn, so I have no idea what the cd's name is) - saw them that same night I missed The Killers. Give 'em a couple of years and let 'em grow into the band name. Pretty boy prep school talent that'll probably fade away once their lead pretty boy starts shooting up.

Whooo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo... Jet/"Get Born" - a cd that actually lives up to the hype. Besides the bass line that's supposed to evoke Iggy Pop era "Lust for Life" but instead makes you think of katina and the Waves, these guys rock w/ gusto. I have no idea what they're singing about, but I don't care cuz I feel like fightin' people.

PP?... The Von Bondies/"Pawn shoppe Heart" - a poor band's Jet. They actually have songs with the names "The Fever" and "The Darkness" w/in the titles. I suppose I'd have to see them live, as their disc doesn't last past a listen or 2.

King Ferdinand of Bohemia... Franz Ferdinand/(self-titled) - I hope there's a Ferdinand II, III and V cuz they show lot's of promise on I. A bit smug for my tastes, and a couple of the tunes are outright weak, but overall this disc is catchy and complex. A more interesting Shins w/ a little early XTC thrown in to "up" the past decade influence factor. Judging from the picture of the band though, I'm not so sure I want to see these guys live-perhaps they'll exist for me only on disc so as to retain the fun.

... Re: NY Times Magazine article "Summer Fun, Anyone?" 7.4.04), Brian Wilson's got a new cd out, and apparently he's finished the Beach Boy's "SMILE" as well after 100 years and 100 trips. Look, I love the guy, for his music and honesty ("I think about my brothers deaths", "my father used to beat the hell out of us", "I like Fall (over Summer)", but he should shut up when it comes to reviews of his contemporarys and new music. It's ok that his hero is Paul McCartney, as the "Cute Beatle" has managed to survive, unlike 2 of his "brothers", but dising the Stones by saying "(my new songs are) not all the same like the Rolling Stones. You know, Rolling Stones songs all sound kinda the same" is kinda dumb, and saying "I don't listen to any younger musicians" is kinda naive...

Speaking of the Stones, here's an awesome quote from Mick Jagger: "It is a fact that the adventure playground behind the zip of my trousers has myth status on the groupie scene."

"As we sum up the weekend in Celebrityville" (something I overheard someone saying or something I saw written earlier this week), here are a few quick perceptions of celebrities that I've met:

Kirsten Dunst-not attractive
Julia Stiles-attractive
Ben Affleck-nausiating/big, blocky, gay?
Toby McGuire-is a Hobbit
Liev Schrieber-is an asshole
Hugh Jackman-is a nice guy
David Wells-is a nice guy
William Peterson-is a nice guy
John Kerry-is a nice guy
Sammy Sosa-is a nice guy
Sammy Sosa's wife-is hot
Dennis Leery-worlds smallest feet
Gary Sinese-worlds smallest head
Rudy Gulianni-world's largest head
Chris Walken-2nd worlds largest head/weird hair
Donald Trump-huge/weirder hair of course
Sean Penn-bigger, blockier than expected/stumbling drunk
Mathew Broderick-bigger, blockier than expected/decent softball player
Joan Allen-teeny tiny
Claire danes-teeny tiny n' flat
Andre 3000-teeny tiny
Mayor Bloomberg-teeny tiny
Nicole Kidman-shy/wild eyed
Laurence Fishburne-cool
John Entwistle-dug leather, heavy metal fringe style
Meg Ryan-sweet as pie
Serena Williams-could kick my ass
Steven Tyler-believes his own schtik/sideshow freak
The Clintons-surreal sideshow freaks

...Lastly, good move on Kerry's part to pick John Edwards, though we all knew after the primaries that he had no other choice, it was a done deal then and a no-brainer. I think he knew then to, just didn't want to stae the obvious, blow a chance for some sure future publicity. It is theatre afterall.

Sunday, July 04, 2004

"We are either going to learn to live together as brothers or die separately as fools"-Marlon Brando (after the assassination of MLKing)

July 4th. To me it conjures up a few distinct memories: 1) lighting a fire cracker on a windowsill in our loft in NYC when I was a kid, and having it explode almost in my face. My dad rushed over and grabbed me hard and said "don't you ever, ever do that again!" 2) seeing the works from a window @ Windows on the World in the old World Trade Ctr. with my dad and bro for some NY Magazine party was I was a kid-pretty swank 3) buying them on Canal street as a kid, cuz you couldn't go a foot with out hearing "fiah-woix! fiah-woix!", much like you couldn't go a foot 10 years ago on Ludlow Street w/out hearing "steel-werks! steel-werks" (woix morphed into werks, as the genuine NY accent was long ago in our city youth by then) 4) seeing the works from a lil' sailboat on the Hudson in the early 90's w/ a bunch of people-you've never seen that kinda fender-bender boat traffic 5) walking back to the LES in the early 90's and having them exploding all around me like it was fucking Beirut (or Bagdad)... Don't get me wrong though, I'm not the patridiotic type, not in the least. When I think of Patrick Henry's quote "I know not what course others may take, but as for me, give me liberty of give me death", I'm thinking of something kinda different than what the jingoistic crowd construes that to mean. I take "give me liberty..." personally, esp. as there really is no ideal liberty to be had in the U.S. like the hype would have you believe. It seems like extreme hypocrisy that we even celebrate the 4th now, esp. in the wake of the realization that something sleazy may have gone down by our government before and after 911, which led to the farce that was/is the war in Iraq. I think the holiday is getting a somewhat lower profile than usual because of this shit, thank God. Seriously, there has not been the kind of commercial uncle sam flag shit being beaten down our throats like in the past years since 911. This holiday our celebration and spending on majestic decorative explosives to launch and gloat over with a pledge of obedience seems... well, wrong. To commemorate the holiday on this here blog, I'm going to go back in time, to our last election year, when Georgey Gorgey shoved a butt-plug up our collective American ass and stole the presidency outright w/ a coup d'etat straight out of the history books. I'm going to let you read some emails I received back in December 2000, after a graphic I made appeared on an anti-Bush website called These emails have never before been viewed by anyones's eyes but mine own. I got like 200 of 'em, some flattering, some, well, not, and I sold like 50 t-shirts of the image. The graphic I made also appeared on the cover of some magazine in LA. If you'd like to obtain a t-shirt, or a complete transcript of the emails, just let me know. I plan to post some more of these emails here as this Derelection heats up over the next bunch of months. So, without further ado, here's the first installment of The Floridubya Emails, enjoy:
From: "Connie"
Subject: Dumbass
Date: Fri, 15 Dec 2000
"Man are you pretty f*cking stupid. First of all comparing George W. Bush to the third Reich of Hitler illustrates your complete ignorance in polotics. Hitler was part of the NAZI party! That is the National Socialist Party. Socialism is to the left (where the Democrats are) and Bush is to the right! And for your disagreement with the Supreme Court thats pretty much a joke too. Just because Al Gore received more votes doesn't mean he wins the election. Here in America we have an Electoral College and the popular vote means crap. So shut the hell up and just accept the fact that he is the president and you are a f*cking idiot!"
From: MJ
Subject: Floridubya photo
Date: Fri, 8 Dec 2000
"Wow! What an EXCELLENT presentation of shrub! Given his family's past ties to the Nazi party it is so appropriate!"
From: Stu
Subject: you mut be Black, Queer or Jewish. Or maybe just a liberal dummy
"you mut be Black, Queer or Jewish. Or maybe just a liberal dummy"
From: Nick
Subject: nice page!
Date: Fri, 8 Dec 2000
"Hello! I am a 16 year old high school student from Philadelphia and in reading your page it definitely gave me a laugh! It is now becoming obvious though, that our next president is a person who thinks morals are important and that the good of the country outweighs the good of themselves. That you page had no effect in the outcome of the election and that you probably have wasted many hours of your life making is is also very evident. For this you should probably kill yourself because your life has no bearing on anything in these United States. So here's to a job NOT WELL DONE by every single Democrat espessily yourself!"
From: Cherie
Subject: loved it!
Date: Wed, 13 Dec 2000
"Thanks for the great Dubyah pic as hitler... well, hwat more can I say other than I love what a dog is compelled to do to a bush. Yep!Good for you.... Re: the t-shirts though, well truthfully, my breasts are too pretty to ever have "him" on my chest..."
Date: Sun, 10 Dec 2000
"I voted republican to get rid of the worst. Now i just realized that i voted for the biggest idiot imaginable. to tell people that their votes don't count unless they voted for me is stupid! Then to tell us that no matter who gets in that we will all pull together is a statement of a complete group of morons. The republicans make me ashamed of my vote. Just count the damn votes unless they're afraid of the results. FAIR IS FAIR!"
From: "Steve"
Subject: Fuck you
Date: sat, 9 Dec 2000
"Fuck you! Revolt now. If I knew who you were I would kick your ass up and own the street. It is time, the law abiding gun owners of America take back this country."
From: Deb and Pat
Subject" put me on your mailing list!
Date: Wed, 13 Dec 2000
"please add me to your list. this is the only place i can feel better tonight!!!"
From: Jim
Subject: No Class!
Date: Wed, 13 Dec 2000
"That's what you are. That website looks like the bathroom wall of a men's bathroom. That's all you'll ever be... the worst part is you don't know it...AND YOU DON'T CARE! It is a sad testimony of the quality of people you are. Look at the website... YOU'RE LOOKING IN THE MIRROR. Get a life and a real job."
From: RealMadrd
Subject: nice page!
Date: Sun, 10 Dec 2000
"i garentee i get more pussy than YOU"
From: "Fair Election"
Subject: Laughin at you!!! YOU SUCK WE WON
date: Thu, 14 Dec 2000
"What a loser you must feel like!!!!! GO GET A GIRLFRIEND...NOT. I love this country and we will make it great agin. YOUR SAD."
From: Ralph
Date: Sun, 10 Dec 2000
"Now is the time for all men to come to the aid of the country.
Now is the time for all men to come to the aid otf the country.
Now is the time for for all men to come to the aid of the country.
Now is the time for all men to come to the aid of the country.
Now is the time for all good men to com to the aid of the country.
Now is the time for all god men to come to the aid of their country.
Now is the time for all good men to come to the aid of the cuntry.
Now is the time for all gopod men to come to the aid of the country."
"America was established not to create wealth, but to realize a vision, to realize an ideal-to discover and maintain liberty among men"-Woodrow Wilson, spoken on a July 4th a zillion years ago...

Happy July 4th yo, I'm heading to a big roof party in S. Williamsburg.

Saturday, July 03, 2004

"I'm Faced and I gotta GO-GO!"

Rollo's back for more, and this time they're not taking "coulda woulda shoulda" for an answer... Tonight, July 3rd @ about 1130pm-ish @ the ol' standby Luna Lounge (171 Ludlow St. b/w Stanton & Houston). Come bring in the 4th with us (and drink a 5th with us while yer at it). This show is FREE baby, FREE...


Rollo is:
Hubert Dulay-tweed guitar samurai
Alex Emanuel-joe strummer/vocalic leadoff
John Dillon-smasher of kit and lighter of it
Sally Donovon-blondie tonk vocalista sista

Friday, July 02, 2004

"Undermine the entire structure of society by leaving the pay toilet door ajar so the next person can get in free" -Taylor Mead

... who still goes into Max Fish, can you believe it?

So... Marlon Brando is dead at age 80. He meant a lot to me, he was outspoken, unpredictable, and just plain the best actor of his generation and the generations after him. I'm not gay, but I remember being a freshman in college and having this super hot bi-chick in my dorm, on my bed one night. She said she'd only circle the bases with me if I told her that I'd fool around with a guy sometime. Well, as I searched for a sincere response to her queery, knowing that if I failed to convince her she'd blow out of there and I'd be left muttering "fuck" to myself, I looked up out of the corner of my eye and saw the poster of Marlon Brando in "Streetcar Named Desire" I had hanging on my dormroom wall. It was a no-brainer, this guy was fucking beautiful, and the little bit of androgeny that all guys posess answered for me; "yes", as I was thinking that's how we're attracted, if you will ,to our heroes and friends, as well as girl friends. If you think about it, whether you want to admit it or not, we're drawn to others b/c of their physical or mental makeup that "attracts us" chemically. You either can't take your eyes off of someone, or at least admit they're good looking, whatever the sex, or you can't stop listening to them. Brando, Cobain, Morrison, Jagger, Hendrix, Chet Baker, Monty Clift, Elvis-my attraction to them is not so different from my attraction to Marylyn, Scarlett Johanson, Angela Lindvall, Nico, Selma Blair, Lauren Bacall and all the hot starlets I'd love to bed, except for that I wouldn't want to bed them, simply cuz that's not my style baby. I think that a little admitted androgeny though can go a long way, it sure did for me that night, whether it was a lie or not, I was sincere in admitting to myself that Brando was hot. Dubya should have learned that from Reagan I think, who must have had some of that shit sink in whether he'd have ever admitted it or not while he was on a set. Yeah, he was a creep as Gov. of CA in the 60's, but give me him over this hollow shell of human flesh (Bush Jr.) anyday. So, if you're 18, go out and rent "The Wild One", now, as Brando's cool appeal was complex, the anti-John Wayne cool. After that flick, get "Streetcar...", cuz his Stanley is just about one of the best damn acting performances ever on the big screen. He's also golden in "Guys and Dolls", "On the Waterfront", "The Young Lions", "The Fugitive Kind", "Mutiny on the Bounty", "Burn", "The Godfather" and "Last tango in Paris". I don't care that he was kinda whack and was mistaken for Shelly Winters more often than not in his later years, this guy was the embodyment of cool rebellion. A guy embraced by the system who couldn't give a fuck about the system. There's not an actor today, no, not Penn, not Depp, and certainly not the overrated Ed Norton, who can touch him, nobody, they're all conformists to a degree, whether they'd agree with me or not. If Depp had Penn's talent, and talent for taking chances, you might have a great actor there. Brando plain didn't give a shit what others thought about him. esp. later on, which in many ways makes me think he became even cooler in his later years. Sucks that I didn't get a chance to meet the man, have a laugh w/ him, get a bear hug.

Commando, or drab and just plain dirty?

Strange days indeed. The last few saw me; at one point carry tons of lighting equipment past a zillion naked fat guys (and one shaved sweet thang) along the sandy beaches of Rob't. Moses (I was not only wearing clothes, but jeans and a shirt-no shorts, however-as it was a commando shoot), auditioning to play L.Ron Hubbard, a gay coked-up German flight attendant, a Doctor who doesn't wear pants and a host of a show that focuses on apartment odor management, asking a gorgeous fire thrower out as well as an 18 yr. old Britney look-alike, tailing a thief who has a warrent out for his arrest on the street while 911 was on the horn, driving back and forth to Williamsburg 4 times w/in 4 hrs to mix a Rollo recording in an unregistered car, talking to a former pugilist who fought Tyson, Holmes and Holyfield, and watching the Red Sox go down like the hindenberg 3 times to the master race of all-star Yankee nazis. I can't possibly go into detail about all this shit before I crash (for the first time in days before 5am), but I will tell you about that first extra-testicle sighting, only b/c the tale has the word beach in it, and it's so goddamn hot right now... I entered the beach near the lighthouse, thinking that was where I was supposed to meet the photog and the rest of crew. It was a shoot about lil' kids though, so as soon as I saw the free hanging, heavily bloated shwans army, I knew I was in the wrong place indeed. I fled the naked prisoners of wharf (with all eyes on me as though I was the rat) and traversed the dificult terrain, blogged down with many, heavy instruments for the kill. I got to the shoot... ahhh, the safety of those all-volunteer little brats... ok, so that story went nowhere, and the way I led into it was even worse. well, as I'm apparently not entitled to much in my life I'm coming to realize, I am entitled to suck sometimes, esp. when my vodka rocks (has become) just plain rocks. Nevertheless, read this review of sorts of my blog power by a writer friend of mine who's opinion I hold in high regard: "'re a hugely talented writer, and it shows throughout your wonderful, extremely clever blog. You're currently in crisis-mode and it endows your blogs with a tension and pathos that marks all worthwhile writing. You're also honest too -- openly blistering to your enemies. This blog thing is new thing coming from you, and I definitely approve. I also really liked the lyrix that you put up on the site..."

...hey, noone told me Letterman had an ongoing skit called "Has George W. Bush been drinking?". Good for him, he has the platform, and really gave it that fuckhead the night I saw his show recently. I had completely forgotten about Dave, like most people, prefering on those rare occasions when I actually turned on the shit box at night to sit through that horrendous Leno show, b/c I knew I'd at least hear some self-depracating humor from Conan O'Brien afterwards (will not even mention that other Craig Stillborn dude, or Carson Daily Spews trite atonal ass-kisser). Fuck man, I also loved reading today that a smirking Saddam said in court, "This is all theatre" designed by President Bush, the "criminal", to win election. I may have to watch his show more often now too. The way CNN described his attire at the hearing too ("he wore a gray suit jacket, a starched white shirt, a belt, brown trousers, highly polished black shoes and brown socks") def. made him a candidate to replace Letterman when he leaves CBS. I guess the former Iraqi commander and cheif was going commando too, as there was no mention of what color undertrou he had on...

As my focus is out of focus tonight, I'm gonna de-blog and saw the log. I will leave you though with an announcement that Rollo's playing this Sat. night 7/03 after 11pm @ Luna (171 Ludlow St. b/w Stanton and Houston) for free, and another passage from "So You want to Be a Rock & Roll Star", by Sharon Lawrence:

"Chapter 25: Your Visual Image

Nobody could claim that Mick Jagger has the greatest voice in rock, but in many ways, he's got something better; he's got the Rolling Stones act together. (He knows) how to create atmosphere, how to constantly hold the audience's interest. (His voice) may be shot, but the audience will almost never notice, b/c the cream of rock performers know how to make it look good. These performers know how to move, what body english to employ to underline a song's lyrics, what facial expressions to exaggerate. These stars were once beginners like you. You don't want to look foolish or phony up there in front of all those people. You want to look and move and perform in a natural way, but with some punctuation to make each number display an appropriate amount of depth and feeling, so that all your songs together make an overall statement of your band's moods and energy level. Think about these things: 1) do the band members move well individually? 2) are any of the band members wearing too much jewelry, or faddish clothes that make them look passe, and generally exuding a " we're trying too hard to be rock stars" image? 3) are the band members wearing colors, or do some of them look drab and just plain dirty?"