Sunday, March 20, 2016

Making up for lost mind.

I did not post at all on here in 2006, 2008 or 2012. There were years flanking those where I posted like twice all year. No one reads this blog, which perhaps bugged me at one point, but now I love that. I've had this page for 12 years now and it's easier than ever to open up this link and post, no hoops, no worries. Write, rant, link, "publish" a pic of mine or someone else's what have you, I can do fucking anything on here... Ok, state of my life: things are whack right now to be sure. After years of supposedly moving upwards in my field of excellence, I'm at yet another crossroads in my life, and about to hit a round fucking number like no other. The last time I decade-ed it I ignored this page. I wish I hadn't, as I would've liked to have read in retrospect what I was going though but... I do remember the basic facts: my "final" band (and, as it were, my 27 years of band life) had come to a crashing end, save for a final sweet lil' tour to Big Sky country a few months hence. I'd recently screwed up a budding relationship with a female celebrity as my financials were all over the map, as was my mind, and I was depressed. Majorly so. I embarked upon my present "career", not knowing what was up, or forward, and alas, I made strides. Over the next ten years I would never be late on rent again while I built up and upon my resume, gained respect and... for what? Aye yai yai, there's the rub. The bottom line is that no one gives a shit, least of all this business or my landlords. People only care about themselves, and you in relation to their needs. Altruism and empathy are in short shrift in this land, but I digress. Depression has hit again like a sack of flour these past 6 months leading up to next months big (birth) day. What has been good is a reemergence of other talents I'd ignored while chasing that elusive and great paid role in the sky: I'm writing again (yeah, here, but more importantly, there), I've demo'd 20 songs for a film I'm a producer on, and... who knows, I may even fucking draw and paint again. So, in the midst of a dry spell and the utter fright of getting yet older, there's a hope. That said, I'd like to repeat my vows again for "snot" as well, as this page is a good thing. Perhaps it will be a time capsule in the end, or a book, or an art show, or a roll of digi toilet paper (who the crap knows), but it shall flow freely from me henceforth at a rate it never did in the past, mark my words. This page started with myspace and Rollo and has survived Facebook and the gobbledygook of gentrified corruption that's swept the city I was born in like a tornado these past 8 years since the "crash", and though I haven't the motherfucking foggiest what the future holds, least of all for me, I shall do my best to hold your attention here for years to come. Love and rock 'n' roll -RM

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